Domestic Abuse in Christian Marriages- Bug Out Plan

I’ve known a few women who’ve worn their abuse like a sort of perverse “badge of honor”, as if it proved them to be  more courageous and somehow spiritually “righteous” by staying in a horribly abusive marriage. This can be a weird sort of pride and spiritual masochism, and it’s not conducive to the wife’s own spiritual growth, or…that of her abuser, who may view his wife/ victims staying in the marriage as a sign she deserved the abuse. Only when the woman gathers the emotional and spiritual sensibility to remove herself, and get out, can she begin to heal and move forward in her own spiritual growth.  And now,  with his victim removed from the scene of the crime, only then is her abuser able to get the memo that he needs to start looking within himself, not her, as the source of his problems.

 

 

 

Women, you are not doing your spouse any favors by allowing this behavior on the part of your husband to continue by staying with him indefinitely! On the contrary, there is a good possibility that you may need to get out of God’s way and allow Him to deal with your abusive husband. Many a good wife has found herself in the middle between a man and God and what God is trying to accomplish in that man’s life, and by refusing to leave finds herself getting hurt! And….God will allow it if that’s what she decides to do!

This is not being selfish on the wife’s part by leaving a serial abuser. It amounts to taking an active part in changing her life, and that of her husband…even though she may never choose to go back into the marriage.

Often men have no motivation to change until a crisis occurs. The “crisis” may have to be that of his wife removing herself from an intolerable situation…..by leaving him.  However, the object here is not to make a move in order to “change” one’s husband, it’s a matter of being safe,  spiritually, emotionally and physically. An abusive man, after all,  is unstable in all his ways.

Can a verbally abusive man suddenly turn violent? You had better understand that yes, of course he can. But know this as well, that verbal abuse can be just as bad or worse than physical abuse. Just ask any woman who has experienced it.

 

 

I’ve recently had a friend tell me, “Well, God hasn’t told me to leave”. I’ve tried to reason with her. But, after all, it is her marriage and she’s going to have to be the one to make decisions about whether to stay or to leave.  After 22 yrs of marriage to this man, it’s not likely that suddenly he’s going to see the truth of what he’s doing in a bolt from the blue. And, what he has been doing is telling her that she’s the one who is mistreating him! Eaten up with self pity, he lashes at her verbally saying the most cruel and downright viscous remarks. He not only orders her around like his personal slave, treating her like a dog, but then accuses his slave of being the one who is inflicting pain upon him.Keeping her on a never ending emotional roller coaster.

It’s simply crazy, and I fear for her. I will talk to her more and try to get through her spiritual “church conditioning” that has instilled in her that she “submit”, no matter what,  to ask her if she believes God hasn’t told her to leave, if that means he has told her to stay, by this supposed silence on God’s part. Maybe, just maybe, God is leaving it up to her.

I really believe she is listening more to her conditioning than she is hearing from God.

 

When an abused wife starts thinking of suicide as a way out of an abusive marriage, it’s already past time to make an exit and get some help! Leaving is not a sign of failure or weakness.

” And as they sought to stone Jesus, He went through the midst of them.” Jesus is the Savior, not us. We can’t “save” our spouses. If we have somehow found ourselves in an abusive relationship or marriage, we need a spiritual bug out plan. 

 

 

 

 

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Counseling Christian Women on How to Deal With Domestic Violence

More in our series Christian Women and Domestic Violence

 

This book takes a very real look into the lives of Christian women who cope with domestic abuse on a daily basis. It explores their experiences of physical,verbal,emotional,sexual, financial, and spiritual abuse at the hands of their perpetrator husbands who claim themselves to be good Christians. Through extensive interviews combined with academic research, the reader comes faces to face with the complexity of issues surrounding such domestic abuse and how counseling can be effective through the encouragement of a variety of religious and non-religious coping strategies.

Of interest to victims of domestic abuse, as well as to the members of the clergy, psychologists, and counsellors, Counseling Christian Women on How to Deal With Domestic Violence shows there is a place in the Christian church for women to separate and to be divorced without losing their faith.  

 

 

Christian Women and Domestic Violence

I’ve been getting many inquiries from Christian women on the subject of domestic violence  in the home.  For that reason I will be starting a series on this issue which has been so misunderstood and caused so much pain to so many good Christian women who were endeavoring to both love and honor their husbands, and their Savior through obedience to the Word of God.

We’ll begin with a study of “The Great Ecclesiastical Conspiracy”

http://www.awildernessvoice.com/GEC.html 

The article above in text form.

Both Christian men as well as women need to study this epic teaching. It is in-YouTube Video form as well. It explains that King James himself had a vested interest in making sure that certain words were put in this translation.  Words like”rule”  and “submit” were intended to reinforce his headship and control over his kingdom. It’s only when we become aware of the truth that it has the power to set us free from the shackles of legalism. The Lord said, “My people perish for lack of knowledge”. Knowledge of what?  God’s Word!
Indeed, knowledge is power. Let’s make sure we are armed with the truth so that we will not succumb to the lies and deception. As one of the Lord’s sheep, even though your pastor or husband is bound by man-made doctrines and traditions of men, of legalistic teachings, by studying the truth, prayer and fasting, you will not have to be. Jesus said to those disciples who believed him, “If you will continue in My Word, then you will be my disciple indeed and then you will know the truth and the truth will set you free” Jesus and his pure doctrine supersedes the faulty, unloving notions of men.

“THE GREAT ECCLESIASTICAL CONSPIRACY”

This is HARD!! Many will not be able to hear this at all!

Is it really possible that the Authorized King James Version of the Bible was INTENTIONALLY DOCTORED to reinforce and support a “priest class” and institutional, political hierarchies. The Protestant Reformation didn’t go far enough. It didn’t really eliminate the temple worship and priest class, it just put a nicer face on it.

This explains why things are this bad. It explains why most of this thing we call “Christianity” is in fact, not at ALL what Jesus had in mind. This explains why so many are being abused in a “system” that was NEVER what God designed in the first place.

This is the audio version of the free E-book available at http://www.AWildernessVoice.com and http://www.FellowshipOfTheMartyrs.com . MANY other resources available.

Repent. The days are short. The Babylonian mystery religions have consumed nearly all the “churches”.

The Lord is crying out, “Come out of her, my people!”

Run for the hills. You and Jesus are sufficient. Let HIM be your teacher.

 

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My Story of an Encounter with an Abusive  Christian misogynist:
I hadn’t been posting much for quite some time. Looking over the web offerings, I figured there were enough sites to offer help,warning and healing for those who had just come out of spiritually abusive situations, or….were still in one, and looking for answers. I was wrong. Just when you think there is nothing new to add, some new abuse presents its ugly head, or perhaps an old abuse presenting itself in a new and novel way. So…I guess it’s time to fire up the blog once again.

I post quite a few resources offering “other” folks help, warnings, etc…but this time it happened to be me that got spiritually stung and hurt…again. Me, who should know better how to avoid such situations and people. Me, who has had her guard up and warns others about how to avoid snares, spiritual abuse and the pain that goes along with it. So….how and where did it happen? On an Internet voice over chat room called PalTalk. PalTalk has a fabulous potential for interaction with other Christians, but it can also be a very dangerous place, especially for vulnerable believers who have been isolated, and left abusive church fellowships and/or even been rejected by friends for leaving these churches.

What happened was that I had been visiting, with great caution, spiritual radar detector turn on, a few spiritual chat rooms and had begun to meet a few people there I felt fairly comfortable with and that seemed to be mature Christians with a healthy grasp of scripture and sound doctrine. This seemed to be a godsend because I was needing the fellowship with like minded believers…perhaps more than even I recognized at the time. However, Satan, never a day late or a dollar short, recognized it and I now believe I was set up for a hurt. Looking back, thank God it was only a hurt and not something much worse.

I had been listening to a man who seemed to be above average in godly wisdom and experience. A really interesting man as well, who I’d seen in various Christian chat rooms, sometimes speaking, or other times posting comments and scripture. We began to cross paths, and he developed an interest in me. To be frank, I was both flattered and also, a bit in awe of this guy. This was filling a need in me for fellowship after having been isolated for so long after leaving the apostate church. We were on the same page…..or so I thought.

After about a month of meeting in various chat rooms, and also spending long hours in private chat rooms, sharing and talking about God, and our experiences, what we had in common, laughing, and praying, I began to trust this man and let my guard down. Something I haven’t done in a long time, and I’m not sure I realized just how much I opened up to this man at the time.

With male, female relationships in any realm, there is always the issue of dominance, but especially in the spiritual realm of Christianity and God ordained authority. I’m not going to get into the scriptural aspects by posting scripture on here. Most of you reading this blog are already aware of what the bible has to say about it. As for me, I don’t have a problem with allowing men to be men, and the authority figure in spiritual relationships………as long as they don’t abuse it, and in the process, begin to abuse me. I am God’s and he is and always will be my husband and the final authority.

If a person has been spiritually abused they will usually be very guarded about boundaries. With me, this is extremely true. Very guarded, even with women. God has given me a level of discernment through hours of prayer, tears, and experience that I am very grateful for. But experience is very expensive in terms of having gone through situations and learning from them, (as you learn not to stick your hand in the fire after the first time, or take fire to your bosom and expect not to get burned).

With abusers, somehow they have the uncanny ability to avoid being detected at the very beginning of an encounter with their victims. Even when one has developed a level of spiritual discernment, if they have an opening, such as loneliness, or need for fellowship, as I did, they are fair game for a predator to slip through the boundary and get inside where they can do damage.

So, to describe the scenario further, there was no question of a romantic relationship developing, so that seemed to make this friendship safer where I could relax and enjoy this mutual love of God with this man…He was well read in the scriptures, and shared many spiritual experiences that gave me no reason to doubt or be afraid of him. For the most part, I felt safe, and anyway, wasn’t I a safe distance from him in PalTalk. How could this godly man possibly hurt me? But in all relationships, sooner or later, traits will begin manifesting. One of the first “disagreements” I had with this man, was over the issue of misogyny. He was adamant that women were the worse abusers of men, and that men were “just as” or more abused than women. In fact, he was a little too adamant about it…to the point that I might have thought at the time he was a misogynist himself, a closet woman-hater. Little did I know at the time, just how right on my discernment radar was absolutely spot on. But……I chose to ignore it, but the red flag was up.

The saying goes that women have a high level of intuition, and I think there is something to this…..but especially true with spiritfilled women who have spent much time in the scriptures and in prayer. In any case, the red flag was up.

Sooner or later, a persons true colors will manifest, as the scriptures say, “Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks”. On PalTalk, for those who aren’t familiar with it, there is a way to talk directly to a person, just like you would talk to them on the phone. Also, there is a way to text little messages to a person, or leave notes for them. So, what happened next between me and my new spiritual friend is this, I’d left a text note for him to read later. The note was a short synopsis of my understanding of “Paul’s thorn in the flesh” and I wanted to make sure we were on the same page. I told him if he agreed with this to just disregard my note. What happened was that he didn’t read or understand what I’d said in my text note, and became irate, accusing me of “being a rebellious woman in the church and one of those women who usurp male authority in the church”, as well as some other accusatory, nasty and overweening remarks aimed directly at me. This floored me, and cut to the quick. I was not only astonished but felt attacked and falsely accused…..which I was.

I have been abused by both women as well as men in the church, but this frankly, was a new experience. I had let my guard down and this woman hating predator got through the door. I sent him a note in text, politely explaining my position and that in no way was I or ever had been a rebellious woman seeking to usurp male authority.
He sent back a lame excuse. I began trying to quietly shy away from him. The trust had been broken. However, not satisfied he came back and contacted me again and began criticizing me, telling me what I should think, what I should do, and “to obey”, not exactly explaining whom I should “obey”, but rather indirectly indicating it should be him.

By this time, I am wanting out. And also by this time, his true colors are showing and he is in full attack, wolf mode and begins to rip me up, telling me everything, (in his opinion), that I’ve done wrong, and what is wrong with me, and that I’m not really “walking in the spirit”.

After this last attack, I sent him back a note saying that Jesus would never talk to me, or treat me the way he did, and that I was not going to accept being spiritually abused in this way. After that, apparently he realized he was not going to be able to dominate me or manipulate me, and so sent back a hateful note with more accusations telling me I was not willing to accept “admonition”, (a handy buzz word for handing you your lunch), and then blocked me from further contact with him, as if that were going to be a problem for me. I was grateful it was over. However…there was the aftermath to deal with.

The aftermath was and is the old spiritual wounds this man left in his wake. Old wounds from the past abuse I thought were healed and now have found out they were still lurking under the surface, and this man ripped them open again. Now, I am praying,Jesus, just please come and love me, comfort me, heal me once again. And LORD, I thank you that you revealed to me what was going on, and that I have the right not to obey mean and cruel commands set up by those assuming false authority in your name. Or accept down in my heart false accusations of wrong doing, by those who would make sad those you haven’t made sad. And also, Jesus, I don’t know who or what made this man the way he is, but please convict him, heal him but keep him from hurting anyone else this way”.

Friends, there is a reason for having healthy boundaries in our lives and guarding our inner circle. Please pray for wisdom and discernment in all your relationships. There are spiritual abusers out there who will cut your soul down to the roots if you allow them to. If you see you’ve opened the door to one of these…back out, run away quickly and never forget to ask the Lord Jesus Christ for help and protection. He is our gentle and good shepherd. He is our protection from wolves that wish to rip us to shreds, and He will never do anything to spiritually hurt and wound us.

Spiritually Abused in Church? What is Your Story?

Many people wouldn’t be reading here if they hadn’t been abused in some fashion.  Those who’ve never been abused, or abusers themselves- wouldn’t know what it felt like, unless they, at some point, felt the sting of it themselves.

It’s my personal belief that all abuse hurts a person spiritually. It’s not likely there will be physical abuse in a church setting, but there, abuse will occur at the very heart of our soul, sometimes driving us into self-condemnation, guilt over false accusations, shaking our spiritual beliefs, and foundation of our faith to the very core.

Our reaction to this may come first as shock, followed by anger and indignation. And soon after, if we are lucky enough to remove ourselves from the abusive situation, we may lapse into a feeling of rejection as we become isolated from former brethren.

My own personal journey through the pain of spiritual abuse was absolute bewilderment and a mind numbing core of hurt that pierced the deepest places in my heart. Even with Christ there to carry me though this, it was without doubt, one of the worse experiences of my life. How could I ever trust “church people” again, now that I knew the truth? Might they not all be like that? I isolated myself from churches, not wanting to take another chance at exposing my deepest feelings to those who were going to reject, falsely judge and hurt me.

My experience with spiritual abuse wasn’t an isolated incident that merely “hurt my feelings”. Instead, without  going into details, it was a long, complex series of abuses that continued over a period of time, that finally culminated with a yet another betrayal, this time even more serious than the others. With this came the  realization that I had to get out. The abuse was affecting me spiritually and emotionally, and there was no other choice but to leave. I couldn’t change anything by staying.

I went through this alone. There was no one to talk to about what happened. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so alone, betrayed, falsely accused,  and rejected in my entire  life. It’s very hard to describe the feelings I had. I’m not sure there are even adequate words. Maybe something close would be like when someone closest to you died, and there is at first shock and then the grieving process sets in after that, but even that doesn’t quite fit, because when I left the church where I was abused, the only one who I felt had died, was me.  The ones who abused and condemned me wrongly, basically for their own false perceptions, went on, justifying themselves together, and continued on apparently oblivious to the havoc created in my life. (Only later, have I found there are many others who were going through, or had gone through a similar circumstance, but at the time, there wasn’t the ground swell rising up of voices on the Internet to expose this “best kept secret” going on in churches all across America). I felt like I was the only one.

So~

Next came the feelings of bitterness and resentment at those responsible for abusing me. This was a small church, so my betrayers had once been my closest friends. Well, at least some of them. The pastor was an enigma…at times he seemed compassionate and real, but most of the time he had a bully pulpit, and made a practice of calling out those who had committed what he felt were infractions in such a way that everyone knew who he was pointing his finger at. He had his little group of favorites, especially those who curried his favor and fawned over him. That wasn’t my style though and maybe he sensed that.

I knew in my heart what they did was wrong, and I also knew my resentment was wrong. I knew I needed to forgive, that I must forgive, but I didn’t know how I was going to be able to do that, the pain I felt went so deep.

Jesus said, unless we forgive others, our father can’t forgive us. That’s a big order sometimes. But unforgiveness is destructive, both on the offenders but also on the one that needs to extend forgiveness. I think this issue of unforgiveness is truly very misunderstood, but I think our own spiritual growth will be stunted if we fail to forgive and, instead,  allow a root of bitterness to grow in our hearts and become twisted and ugly.

Think about that. If we allow our hearts to become cold and bitter, then Satan has won the round and we will end up more like those who abused us…hypocrites. I don’t want to be like that and neither do you. We need to keep short accounts with God so our prayers can get answered and so that we can move forward in our walk in the
Spirit, leaving ugly emotions behind us. That is the victory over spiritual abuse.

It can be done, but only through much prayer and communion with Jesus in worship, asking for help and laying all burdens at the foot of the cross, for truly, we can do nothing without him.

Jesus bless all of you going through these struggles and I thank God who will give us the victory as we turn fully to him.

Since that time, many years ago, I have studied the phenomena of spiritual abuse in churches, in depth, inside and out, and from every angle. I know what makes it tick, and the games people play in church, all the way from the pulpit, to those in other “leadership” aspects of the church, all the way to those who sit in the pews. There is a pattern to these things, even from church to church, from one denomination to another, in one way or another. I have arrived at this from not any disconnected “psychological analysis”, but from personal experience with scripture and an intimate relationship with my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, who by His mercy and grace brought me out of it.

If you have been spiritually abused in a church, by the pastor, or another church member, or even the group. You may tell your personal story here, anonymously. Just post it under the comment section here and I will create a post from that, leaving out the parts you choose, (names, places, etc). Your privacy will be vigorously protected. E-mail addresses, personal names will never be released to others, nor will any other privately communicated information. If you would like to talk to me personally, send an e-mail to SpiritualAbuseSanctuary@hotmail.com. I will be glad to talk to you. Skype chats can also sometimes be arranged. I am not a psychologist,  nor do I give medical advice, but I will be happy to listen to hurting people who have been through spiritually abusive situations in church, or in the home.

~God bless you,

Scarlett

Hephzibah House of Horrors

 

I believe the testimonies of these girls. Their stories deserve to be told, over and over if need be, until the perpetrators of such abuses get the message that their abuses against these girls will be shouted from the housetops, with them exposed and hopefully punished, and/or jailed, and then hopefully these types of  crimes will cease to exist.  I have a real problem with pastors, individuals, churches…..anyone…. who abuse other people in the name of God, and I will tell about it whenever I can. That’s what I love about the Internet…finally, these best kept secrets….. crimes done “in the name of God” are being exposed, and victims are coming forward to tell their stories and put the spotlight on the abusers.

Soon, I hope to do a post on similar abuses within so-called ministries for boys and men. 

The following is a HUGE list of survivor statements and testimonies of the girls who’ve been in Hephzibah House, and I seriously doubt if this even begins to skim the surface:

http://www.survivorstatements.webs.com/

 

 

Domestic Violence in Christian Marriages~an Alliance Made in Hell

I decided to post this video on domestic violence after reading from the following blog. To be sure, spiritual abuse occurs in Christian marriages as well as it does in secular marriages. However, as opposed to domestic violence in secular marriages… without having any statistics on hand, I think I would be fairly safe in stating that usually the spiritual and/or physical abuse within Christian marriages is centered around the misapplication of the scriptural passages concerning the “wife submitting to her husband”.

Some fascinating reading here on this blog!

http://submissiontyranny.blogspot.com/search/label/controlling%20behavior%20in%20men

Below, an anonymous commenter sends in a scathing accusation to the blogger:

 

“You take away and add to scripture, you are aligned with satan and must seek forgivenness, for women are to be submissive to man and man treat women like Christ treats the church, this is why your evil feminist perspective is part of the destruction of the family and you are in great delusion or are a planted wolf, i shake the dust from my feet and rebuke you. May Jesus forgive you.”

These sorts of comments are very frustrating to bloggers because, for one thing, the blogger is not going to be able to reason with an unreasonable person. In this case, the Christian blogger must simply do the wise thing and resort to scripture.

You Christian men who are obeying Jesus, and loving your wife as Christ loved the church, this post is not about you. May Jesus bless you richly, and as the scripture says, your prayers will not be hindered because of disobedience as will those who are mistreating and possibly battering their wives.

Opinions anyone?

 

Spiritual Abuse-What are the Signs You may be in an Abusive Church?


Who gave these churches the right to change the way God set up the church?  Back then, as a newbie, I tried to make excuses, such as, “Well, they’re doing some things right”…and, “these are different times we’re living in now, and after all it looks like they do love the LORD”.

When I first came out of the spiritually abusive church, I felt I must surely be the only one in the world that had ever experienced such abuse and betrayal in the “house of God”.  Some day soon, I hope to get around to posting about what happened there in the “full, unedited version”. But not just yet, …at this time I just feel led to tell a few incidents that happened during that time period, as a new believer, I realize I was being groomed to be conformed…not into the image of the Beloved, Jesus Christ, but being groomed to be conformed into a counterfeit, an apostate, a Pharisee.

There’s a lot to tell from the very beginning that should have been warning signals. Yes, I do believe very early on the Holy Spirit was showing me in the Word,…….that the church I was involved in at that time, was controlling, biblically “off”, legalistic,  and trying to get me to conform to their system, their “ways” of doing church, and it was a controlling man made system full of man made doctrines and traditions of men that really had little to do with the pure worship of God.

I had gone into this church as a new spirit-filled believer, wanting to serve Jesus with all my heart and ability. I was studying the Word of God, and was like a sponge to learn more.  I started wondering why this church didn’t bear any resemblance to the early church in the bible in the book of Acts. 

As you can see, those are the excuses a novice might come up with who has little or no experience in how things work in the apostate, organized church system. Jesus doesn’t change by the whims and times of man, He, is the same, yesterday, today and forever. That’s one of the awesome things to admire, thank and love Jesus for, He’s not capricious.

Anyway, after the initial love bombing was over at this small church I had joined, the grooming and subtle controlling began. You know it’s amazing….no matter how small the church, there seems to be a set of unspoken “rules” that as if by magic, become operable. You can count on it……

With me, I was in this to be real, to love and serve the LORD, but I had a lot to learn about the way the “church did church” and expected its members to “do church”.  Meanwhile, I was getting little memo’s in my study time in the bible from the Holy Spirit, concerning these issues in the church. For example, this one…

 

 

12As many as desire to make a fair shew in the flesh, they constrain you to be circumcised; only lest they should suffer persecution for the cross of Christ. 13For neither they themselves who are circumcised keep the law; but desire to have you circumcised, that they may glory in your flesh. 14But God forbid that I should glory, save in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, by whom the world is crucified unto me, and I unto the world. 15For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision availeth any thing, nor uncircumcision, but a new creature. 16And as many as walk according to this rule, peace be on them, and mercy, and upon the Israel of God.”Galatians 6

 

 

Now, see, it’s pretty plain- in the context of what the Spirit was showing me, that even modern-day churches don’t demand their congregants to get physically circumcised, but they do try to bring them  back under the law, and into the bondage and conformity to legalism. They want you to conform to their pattern, so “they can GLORY IN YOUR FLESH”. So, that in your outward appearance, you’ll look and act JUST LIKE THEM! The problem here is that it’s all superficial, like Jesus accused the Pharisees, of looking like whitened sepulchres, only inside they were full of dead mens bones.

Something else the Holy Spirit was showing me in the Word of God about that time was this, that went along the same lines and was confirming the other scripture………..

 

 

14But their minds were blinded: for until this day remains the same veil not taken away in the reading of the old covenant; which veil is done away in Christ.

15But even unto this day, when Moses is read, the veil is upon their hearts.

16Nevertheless when one shall turn to the Lord, the veil shall be taken away.

17Now the Lord is that Spirit: and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty.

18But we all, with unveiled face beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord. 2nd Corinthians 3.

 

 

Legalism! Being practiced in the household of God! And the LORD was trying to show me in His Word that this was not His way…that I was free in Him and  showing me not to allow myself to be brought under the bondage of their system. You see, if “your veil is taken away”, you be able to see clearly, and have the “eyes to see, and ears to hear” that Jesus has provided for those who love and obey Him and His Word.

You would be surprised how many churches are doing this in one form or another, and believe me, they will not take kindly to a new member who comes in expecting to remain uncontaminated by their system and doctrines.

If you’ve come to this page, I’m assuming that you may be in a church situation that doesn’t seem right, and in fact may be an abusive church. You see, what I’ve described IS spiritual abuse, but inevitably, if a new member doesn’t conform, it’s not going to be a matter of if, but when, the spiritual abuse becomes very up front and personal, and directed toward you. That’s when decisions have to be made…and you either succumb to the manipulation and fear, or…you leave.

I pray for each and every person who comes here with such a burden on your heart, that you will be set free and healed from all legalistic, man-made bondages. Jesus loves you and wants you to be FREE to love and serve Him in the Spirit, free of the shackles of Nicolaitanism.

As I said before, when I came out of the apostate church I felt so alone, and like there was no one in the world to talk to that understood. Just know that here, you will find brothers and sisters that care, and you CAN talk to and share your experiences, and you will not be ostracized, or condemned. Talking, sharing, and praying together about the  spiritual abuse we’ve suffered is very cathartic and healing, and this is basically what this blog is all about. 

May Jesus bless you~

Scarlett