I’ve reblogged this topic on my site because almost daily there are search terms on my stats from Christian men seeking help because of their wives not wanting intimacy with them. Also…because I thought the comments from the brothers on Brother Al’s site were more helpful in receiving deliverance from porn bondage. Intimacy is a two way street. I’ve cautioned wives before about not putting a stumbling block in their husbands way by continually refusing intimacy.
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Spiritual Abuse Sanctuary 
Scarlett, a woman’s version of porn is the romance novel and soap operas. How many women bury themselves in this fairytale world as an escape from their “prince that turned into a frog” after they kissed? When both parties in a marriage give their hearts totally to Christ he orders their lives in such a way that unity in all areas of life take place because they are both IN Him.
Michael
Good reply Michael. I can’t speak to that personally, (about romance novels, soap operas, and frogs), but do know some years ago I had to stop watching Lifetime on TV for the very reason that it was overly sexualized. Then, praise God, stopped the cable payment altogether, which would probably benefit marriages and families all the way around. The temptations are everywhere in this culture we live in, and indeed, as you say, couples would need to devote themselves to Christ completely and without reservation in order to maintain their marriage Covenant.
Scarlett
I do see a need for more to be taught in the area of wives responsibility in the marriage bed where intimacy is concerned, so that they don’t put a stumbling block in their husbands lives, “giving Satan an advantage”, which he will be sure to take, given the opportunity.
Both husbands and wives have a mutual responsibility in their marriage covenant where sexual intimacy is concerned.
There is a wealth of wisdom in the chapter of Job 31, but guys, this ones for you to observe.
“I have made a covenant with my eyes;
1 Why then should I look upon a young woman?
2 For what is the allotment of God from above,
And the inheritance of the Almighty from on high?
3 Is it not destruction for the wicked,
And disaster for the workers of iniquity?
4 Does He not see my ways,
And count all my steps” ……………..
Men, if you don’t fire up your testosterone with porn and ogling other women, it may very well be that your and your wife’s libidos might be more evenly matched.
For wives…how would you feel if your husband defrauded you by continually refusing intimacy? Frustrated perhaps? Of course. Whatever the problem is, God has provided an answer. The first thing for both of you, as Christians, is to sit down and talk about the issues your having and then just as important, to pray about them together and ask the Father’s help. Porn, adultery, or one spouse defrauding the other is never the answer.
You wives are very blessed to have husbands to love, cherish and share intimacy with your husbands. Take care of that blessing and guard it, as your mate may not always be there.
As a single woman and widow for a long time, I’ve had to deal with these issues myself and I can tell you it can be done through having such a focus on Jesus that somehow he transfers that overwhelming natural urge over into being subjected to Him. I didn’t say it was easy, but on the other hand, it’s not torment either. It’s Grace and the Power of God to Deliver you.
~Scarlett